Precognitive Fortune Cookies
by MasterMind v.2.0
Summary: A great fortune inside a cookie leads to a new relationship. (SchuldigYohji)


**Precognitive Fortune Cookies**

_By: MasterMind v.2.0_

_Warnings- Shounen-ai (Yohji/Schu…or Schu/Yohji… ^_^'), general weirdness, short (HEY! It's just the first chapter. ^_~)_

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The day had started out normal enough.

He had gotten up, had his usual pancakes and alcohol breakfast (no one knew _why_), annoyed and ignored Crawford for a while, picked on Nagi, let Farfarello out… Let's see, what else did he do? Oh, yes, and he lazed about until he decided to get some lunch.

But hey, he was Schuldig, and Schuldig seems like the type of guy who would like to shop (but be horrible at it ^_^), so therefore, he went shopping.

Yes, he was supposed to be getting lunch, but he forgot.

Bringing a new green blazer up to the counter, he calmly paid for it, wincing a little when the salesperson told him to 'have a nice day'.

_/How can I have a nice day?! I live with a kid, a stick-up-the-ass workaholic, and a psycho… plus, I'm an assassin. Never am I gonna get to 'have a nice day'. 'Dodge flying knives and golf clubs day' is a common occurrence though. /_

But what was that she'd whispered on his way out?

"Don't be afraid of white…"

_/Don't be afraid of white…the hell? Lady, I'm not scared of white, I'm wearing white…you just can't see it. Weiß? Don't fear Weiß? I don't already. I fear no one. Except maybe Farfarello. He's just slightly a danger. I could get lost in his mind. And I still have so much left to do… and so many people./_

But being the curious creature that he was, he seriously pondered her comment all the way to his favorite German restaurant in the heart of Kyoto. (When did German become a food style anyway? ^_~)

Ordering expensive food on Brad's account always cheered him up, but not today. He'd tried (and ordered) everything and nothing worked. He was still caught up on the saleswoman's comments, why were they bugging him so much?

_/I wonder what Balin- Yohji would think about this…/_

Gah. He had to stop thinking about that one… he was NOT obsessed with Weiß's lanky playboy. He was NOT! He did not want to ravish him, fuck him… nothing. He was not obsessed in the slightest. Okay, maybe just a bit. Okay, maybe it was more than a bit. Hell, maybe it was a full blown case of obsession. 

He had to admit, the other man was attractive, had about the same attitude toward life as Schuldig did, and knew what kind of a life Schuldig was living. And he didn't give a damn.

_/I couldn't give a damn, my dear Schuldig./_

Laughing at his own joke, he finished his meal, and stood up to leave. (Let's just say that he brainwashed the waitress… I paid… I paid.) His mind was set on going home. After all, there was more chaos to cause. Passing a bowl of fortune cookies (in a German restaurant?), he grabbed one and walked out the door.

Cracking the cookie open, Schuldig ripped the fortune out, and without a second glance, tossed it into the wind to drift wherever, and shoved the cookie in his mouth.

The fortune drifted down the sidewalk and slowly got further away from Schuldig. If he had taken the time to read it, it may have surprised him.

**_"You will have a headlong collision with the one you desire."_**

It may also have saved him one hell of a headache.

For no reason, Schuldig felt the urge to run, after all Brad was waiting, and he'd probably caught Farfarello by now. But you never know, on the days when they forgot to give him his medicine (usually on the days when Schuldig had to remember it – like this one), he was pretty wild.

Schuldig was lost in his thoughts as he ran down the road.

So was Yohji Kudou.

Fresh from a (failed) date, he was starting to get worried. His fantasy was being taken too far. Hell, he'd even called the girl 'Schuldig'. She hadn't been too pleased over that. He didn't know why, what did Schuldig mean anyway? All he knew was it was the redhead's name. But even the 'Kudou Charm' hadn't been able to work. In fact, it failed miserably. Every move he made seemed to make it worse. Eventually, he'd given up, bid the girl goodbye, and started home, deep in thought.

_/It wasn't my fault for calling her the redhead's name. She looked exactly like him…/_

Just keeping telling yourself that, Yohji. She was German. That's it. She was a blonde with brown eyes, not a redhead with blue-

_/- his beautiful -/_

Right. Beautiful blue eyes. Therefore, calling her Schuldig was of your own free will. Speaking of which, snap back to reality, Yohji. Preferably… NOW!

 *BANG* *CRASH* *FLOP* *Chu.*

Wait… Chu?

A slightly stunned Schuldig didn't even bother to open his eyes. That had hurt. Whatever train had hit him had to be long gone, leaving the German to deal on his own. Right now, all he wanted was to stay where he was and rest for a bit. Regain his strength. But still, it would be nice to have a little help.

_/Oh well, at least the pavement's warm… and soft? /_

But don't you think seeing a man lying facedown would be a little strange especially when he's lying on an-

_/heating vent? /_

Another man.

_/Wait a minute… this isn't a heating vent…/_

~tbc~

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[1] – Chu- the sound effect used in manga to signify a kiss. 

As for the title- I don't know _where _it came from. Let's just blame it on the Sugarhigh!Crawford muse.

And for Schu's knowing of 'Gone with the Wind', let's just blame that on Crawford too. He probably brought home a (poorly) subtitled version of it on once of those off-nights.

'Till next time,

 Shuru-chan

Comments and Critiques welcomed! And greatly appreciated. English isn't my first language, so I know it's probably not perfect. ^_^'


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